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I always say, I am Mexican, but was born here. Invariably, I am
always asked by Mexicanos, what part of Mexico? It seems that an immediate
formation of one's family background is formed when you tell them where...which
means I am considered a nortena - and my progressive ideas almost seem to be
forgiven (lol)
...but the truth is that I raised by a family from La Barca,
Jalisco...whose family migrated to Guadalajara - which was considered provincial
(by elders), and a certain decorum was expected as a female.
....ah, pero la sangre llama, and I was never able to conform to the
provincial expectations, despite the many hours dedicated to crocheting, sewing,
and strict upbringing of culture/manners. I was always "out there", almost
tom-boyish, with radical ideas, ready to defend them verbally.....not acceptable
for a provincial upbringing....where the art of social graces was an expectation
(meaning that I had to be quiet, demure, and find my way through acceptable
male/Catholic norms).
....talk about identity crisis.....but I felt I came home when I met my
relatives from Coahuila...strong stock from the frontier settlement.....however,
I have yet to meet Zacatecanos relatives......I wonder if I inherited my
disposition from both sides of the family????
Esperanza
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