Re: [ranchos] Mary Allen's successful trip

[Mary Allen <mary.allen3770@...>]

After replying, I hit some key and erased everything I had written with so much passion.  That is good; now I can take a deep breath and be calm.

 

I do think you are correct in your evaluation.  Wife #2 was very possessive. I am certain of it.  When Petra was a lovely 22 year old living with her madrina, she received a photo of her father with this attractive very young woman he identified as his wife.  I can only imagine what Petra felt as she noticed that the woman had not only linked arms with her father but was holding his hand, rather awkwardly, as well.  She is hanging on to him!  I would consider the photo rather indiscreet.  Most photos of the time were rather formal.  Now when I see the photo it really annoys me. 

 

I am trying to find out who the madrina was.  I think her name was "Mariquita" but that is all I have.   After having enjoyed a rather affluent life, when Petra moved in with her madrina, she had to help her in her little store.  I don't think she was unhappy about that; she learned a lot that she used later, but she knew that her father's second family (8 children) were living very well.  She must have felt the "exile" keenly, especially since she had a brother and sister somewhere as well.

 

On the 28th,  a descendant of wife #2 will come to visit.  This will be our first meeting.  He has already published his genealogy.  I hope that over lunch, and after I present him with all that I have collected about his family (including her photo) that he will have something to share.  Of course, I will be nice, and keep my feelings private. 

 

I have my great grandfather's photo as a mature man.   You can imagine how I feel when I look at it.  How could he treat dear little Petra like that? I want to know.  I will know. 

 

I'll let you know how it turns out.  It may reveal things that I prefer not to know, but that is the chance we take.  But I am apprehensive.  My sister and brothers are watching from the sidelines; I think they are apprehensive too.  But history is history.

 

Thank you for your reassuring letter.  And please have a very peaceful and merry Christmas and may the new year be filled with God's choicest blessing for you and your family at home and your extended Ranchos family.

 

Mary

Joseph Puentes <makas@...> wrote:

Wow! What a great and exciting trip you had. . .and to think you got all
of that done with a broken foot. I'm so happy you feel the trip was
successful. Sorry to hear of them not remembering your Grandmother Petra
Romero Gonzalez. I'm wondering if being from the first wife had anything
to do with it? Maybe the second wife was so possessive that she
"deleted" her even from the family history. Just guessing of course. Why
not try to contact the family members of the "madrina" there is a story
here and as you said you might be surprised when you find it. At one
point I was about to not pursue a certain line of my genealogy because I
was sure it would prove my grandparents were 2nd cousins and that was
just way to close for comfort and I didn't want to hurt my Tia Julia's
feelings with that information. In the end I pursued the line and found
that the "one" Tadeo Diaz who I thought was the common relative turned
out to be "twins" both named Tadeo Diaz and the common relative was
their parents Vicente Diaz and Hipolita Ribas thus making them 3rd
cousins (which of course was much more respectable. . .note: its funny
how people react toward cousins marrying each other, it really seems to
be a taboo, but in reality it was a way of life in the days when travel
and community size made it difficult not to marry a relative, even
unknowingly).

your trip sounded wonderful and full of surprises. your father was a
wise man asking you if you were sure you could take the good with the
bad you might discover. And yes it does sound like you have become a
genealogy addict. welcome to the crowd.

happy holidays,

joseph


Mary Allen wrote:

> Hello!
>
> I actually returned on December 8 from Mexico City and San Felipe
> "Torres Mochas", Guanajuato, but I believe a large piece of my heart
> is still in Mexico. That trip has totally changed my life. Really. I
> don't really know where to begin because it was such an incredible
> experience.
>
> Much of the success of this trip I attribute to the kind help of many
> of you. There is Carol Turner who advised me about collecting
> "classic" photos, which I did. I purchased a good digital camera just
> before I left and gave up trying to master the manual on the plane.
> Luckily my new primo's son was into things electronic and taught me
> how to use it. Lucky me! My 80-year-old primo Enrique Guzman Romero
> has been into genealogy for decades and has written extensively about
> his town especially researching why it is called "Torres Mochas".
> He has a magnificent collection of photos of several generations of
> the Romero family. The most outstanding was his collection of wedding
> photos. Beautiful. I have to go back when the weather is warmer
> because even with four days there just was not enough time to copy all
> the photos I wanted and gather information.
>
> And thanks to Victor Villarreal for warning me about traveling alone.
> Just before I was to leave, I broke my left foot. That really
> affected my plans but there was no way I would not go. But I was
> fortunate that Continental Airlines helped me all the way there and
> back and I had to do very little hobbling. I took your advise about
> the airport taxi in Mexico City and got the pay in advance kind.
> Truthfully, my impetuous nature was challenged a bit because I had to
> depend on others to help me because I just could not manage the
> cobblestones with my "boot". Sigh. And I always seemed to be on
> cobblestone.
>
> And thank you, Joseph. My first stop was to visit a 93 year old
> prima who asked me to come to her convent in Mexico City even though
> she confided to others she had no idea who I was. Imagine my chagrin
> when doing more looking through old photos I found one of the two of
> us, together. She is blind and almost deaf but she got a chuckle when
> I told her I had evidence that we had met in 1967 and had posed for
> several photographs together in San Antonio, Texas.
>
> Joseph had advised me to actually make a list of the questions I would
> pose. That was so important. I had no problem with the small tape
> recorder; she couldn't see it, but because I had to speak into her
> ear, I had to make my questions clear and brief. She was so alert
> and had great answers. Once she started talking she was off
> non stop, she remembered so much that I hardly had to coax her at
> all. She came up with wonderful anecdotes about her life as a young
> woman. She even spoke of what a wonderful pianist "Manuel" was. I
> took a chance and asked her if she meant the Manuel Ponce who wrote
> "Estrellita". That's exactly whom she meant and she was off on an
> anecdote about him.
>
> We had three wonderful sessions. Then she got the flu and she was so
> medicated that she slept for the next three days that I was there. I
> regretted not being able to visit more with her but it gave me an
> opportunity to speak to the other Sisters in the convent and I heard
> great stories about their experiences during the revolution and when
> they were young. With them I visited a wonderful bazaar of indigenous
> arts and later a Pastorela at a school. I ate some interesting
> foods. But it was so cold. Even though I had warm clothing with me,
> it just wasn't enough.
>
> Sister Beatrice drove me to the airport when I was gong to Leon,
> Guanajuato. She has nerves of steel. She just smiled when she heard
> me gasp.
>
> My primo and his son Oscar met me at the airpor at Leon. What a
> blessing because our destination was another hour away...at a fast
> clip through some very mountainous, curvey upward climbing highway.
> I clung to the seat as I looked dowwwn. It was beautiful but just so
> far down there and I wondered if it was really necesarry to drive so
> fast.
>
> Emilie Garcia had advised me to take large photos. I took her advice
> and prepared a bound copy of our family photos. It was a hit. My
> host and primo, Enrique, seemed to like it very much. He carried it
> around, showing it off. Thanks, Emilie.
>
> But the gift Enrique had for me far surpassed anything I could
> imagine. He teased me about my complaints that I came from " una
> familia muy chiquita". I followed him to his studio and watched as he
> reached for a long roll which he slowley unrolled across his desk. It
> must have measured about 7 ft. "Aqui esta tu familia "chiquita"", he
> smiled. I couldn't breathe! It was covered with names and
> photographs. I really wanted to cry. Immediately I saw my great
> grandfather's photo as a handsome young man. And I learned that his
> mother's name was Josefa Galvan.
>
> There were so many beautiful people all down the length of the tree.
> There were hundreds of names. I was speechless. "Jamas puedes decir
> que tienes una familia chiquita!" But I wondered how I was going to
> get a copy of this. From the drive through the small town I seriously
> doubted that there was a "Kinkos". But, on the fourth day he
> surprised me by carefully rolling it up and giving it to me before I
> left for the return trip. Such generosity.
>
> I did contribute something to him, however, that he did not expect...a
> branch, well, maybe a twig, on his great tree. Somehow, my
> grandmother Petra Romero Gonzalez, had disappeared altogether. Her
> brother and sister were there, but she appeared no where. He was so
> surprised that he got on the phone and called relatives in San Luis
> whom he had interviewed and who had spoken affectionately about the
> othe two siblings but never mentioned Petra. And they still did not
> know about her. They insisted she did not exist but of course I had
> photos of her and even some documents clearly identifying her. She
> even lived in the area for 40 years.
>
> I went through some very sad moments and Enrique and I were on the
> internet, on the phone and even made a couple of visits to interview
> living relatives who still remembered the family. I was crushed when
> they would shake their head and say they never heard of her. It
> really made me very upset. Petra was the child of Victor Romero
> Galvan's first marriage. He had many children from his second
> marriage and I knew that my grandmother for some reason did not like
> the second wife. In fact when her mother died, she was sent to live
> with her "madrina", but she knew the second wife,Sotera Gutierrez.
> Enrique and I worked an average of 5 to 8 hours a day, far into the
> night, searching everywhere and everything, photos, lists, calling
> here and there, to no avail.
> Now I just want to know "why". In fact I have a list of 13 "whys".
>
> I don't remember who told me about dreaming about our ancestors. I
> did. A lot. Maybe it was because I studied the photos all four days
> that I was there. Over and over, looking for a familiar face in a
> group photo. Looking for some clue. In my dreams I could see them
> all, walking around, saying something to me, but I couldn't
> understand. It was a recurring dream and I could see their mouths
> move, but couldn't hear the words . I could especially see
> my bisabuelo, come so close to me, speak, smile and move away. I told
> Enrique; he just shrugged his shoulders. He saw that I was upset.
> So, we promised to meet when it is warmer and my foot is healed and go
> to San Luis Potosi where there is another primo who has a collection
> of family letters. We hope maybe one of them will give us some
> information.
>
> When I got home, I wasted no time in moving all of Petra's material
> from the Romero binder to the Garana binder. They won't get her back
> until they let me know why they ostracized (?) ignored(?) alienated
> (?) her. There is a story there and I so want to know even though in
> knowing it may cause more hurt. My father warned me when I started
> this many years ago. He said to be certain you were ready to accept
> anything you might find out. Now I wonder if he knew something. It
> would be safer to just get dates and connections and not stories...but
> people are more than dates. And if what I learn is shocking or
> hurtful, I'll deal with it.
>
> So, back to the drawing board.
>
> On ROMERO family tree there are the following who lived in Salinas,
> SLP, Aguascalientes, San Luis Potoso,SLP, Lagos de Moreno, Jalisco.
> The oldest names date to 1800.
>
> ALVARADO, AVILA, ANDRADE, ARAGON, AGUIRRE, BALERO, BLANCO, CARREON,
> CORTEZ, CASTANEDA, CASTILLO, CARMIN, CHAVEZ, CHENHOLLS, CAMPOS,
> CERVANTEX, CANALES, CASTELAZA, CORILLO, CONTRERAS, CASTRO, DE LA ROSA,
> DELGADO, DE ESNAURRIZAR, DELGADILLO, DEL TORO, ESQUIVEL, ESCUDERO,
> FLURY, FONSECA, GARCIA, GARZA, GAMA, GUEVARA, GALLARDO, GRIMALDO,
> HERNANDEZ, HIGUERA, IZCARENO, ISAIS, JUAREZ, KOUBICHER, LUNA, LOPEZ,
> LLAMAS, LICON, MARIN, MATA, MANTECA, MENDIOLA, MONTOYA, MEDINA, MUNOS,
> MEDELLIN, NAJERA, OWENS, OROZCO, OTERO, PINA, PEDROSA, PRIETO, PEREZ,
> PONCE, RIVERO, ROJAS, ROMERO, RODRIGUEZ, REGALADO, RAMOS, RUIZ, ROMAN,
> REBOLLEDO, ROBINSON, SALINAS, SAUSO, SNCHEZ, SAN JOSE, SALDIVAR,
> TREJO, UGARTE, VIDALES, VALADEZ, VELARDE, VELEZ, ZUAREZ,
>
>
> My poor primo tried so hard, but we came up with nothing. Well, when
> I left, I was so grateful for all and he did go to his computer, type
> up our twig and paste it on. I came back with many anecdotes about
> life in their times; Mimi Lozano suggested that I write them up and
> submit them to her. I may. It was Mimi who lead me to Ranchos so I am
> especially grateful to her.
>
> Again, thanks to everyone for the help and encouragement. If any of
> the above names are of interest to anyone, i'll be happy to provide
> what I have.
>
> I think I have become genealogy obsessed. Now I just can't stop.
> But I still did not find a thing about the GARANA side!
>
> Mary
>
> PS You may not hear from me for a while, but rest assured that
> everyday I read everything single item with great interest and gusto.
> I wish you all a peaceful Christmas and a wonderful new year full of
> new discoveries. May your ancestors be kind and allow themselves to
> be found!!
>
>
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